𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐃𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐈𝐭 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐓𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐁𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐚𝐧 𝐔𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐋𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫?

WEBVTT

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So I'm not asking you to do anything you're not already doing.

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But when you hear that voice of resistance in your head that says I can't do this, we can't do that, it's impossible.

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This is hard, be like, hey, look just for two minutes, just like, have fantasy.

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I'm not arguing, I'm not saying it's not impossible, but I'm asking you for two minutes to say, if it were possible, how would I do it?

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Right, and what it does is it gives your brain permission to go find the answer.

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If it were possible, how would we do it?

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Hey, uncommon Leaders, welcome back.

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This is the Uncommon Leader Podcast.

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I'm your host, john Gallagher.

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Well, get ready to build your inner armor.

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Today I'm bringing the big guns literally to discuss building an unshakable mindset in a world that's constantly distracting us in many different ways.

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Our guest today has gone from Marine sniper to FBI special agent, to pastor and now executive coach, author and international speaker, and the stakes that he's going to talk about today are very important.

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We're specifically going to talk about his newest book, inner Armor, but we'll talk more about that.

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He's a neuropsychology PhD, so he's teaching from science as well.

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As we go through this, a sought-after speaker, he is going to bring the heat for you today.

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I want to welcome Andrew Whitman to the Uncommon Leader Podcast.

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How are you doing, friend?

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Hi, mighty man of valor, john Gallagher, thanks for having me coach.

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Here we go, I'm going to jump you right in, no rest going in.

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I'm going to give you the first question.

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I always give first-time guests the last 170-plus episodes, and that's to tell me the story from your childhood that still impacts who you are today, as a person or as a leader.

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Yeah, absolutely.

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I mean, it really is.

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It's the foundation of everything.

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Really, all the decisions I started making I was the fat kid in high school really started in middle school and my mom and dad were missionaries.

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So I was brought up in a town in Australia called Wagga Wagga, new South Wales, halfway between Sydney and Melbourne.

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And you know, the Australians they don't mind, you know, come up with nicknames.

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So my nickname was Beach Ball because I was 5'3 and 185 pounds.

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So it was pretty brutal.

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But being a missionary's kid can't fight back, so you're a weak target.

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So I'm living my life in fear and anxiety just constantly.

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And the plan was me would graduate high school.

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Out of six kids I was the one supposed to go in the ministry.

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Bible college was up and I thought, if I don't get this under control, I don't want to live the rest of my life like this.

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How am I going to lead anybody?

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I can't even lead myself.

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So I enlisted in the Marine Corps, so that that, and lost 50 pounds in bootcamp.

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So I that whole thing about you know.

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I just didn't want you probably.

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No, I'm not telling you anything.

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You don't know, john, like even today, you know, decades later, when I look in the mirror, I still see the fat kid.

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I still hear beach ball, I still, you know, no matter how fit you get, no matter how you know you clamp, it's still kind of lurks back there behind the curtain.

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So you're just have to constantly put that under every day.

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It also, but it keeps me frosty man.

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Oh man, I think you know even that, that very last part in terms of saying it, and that's always with you.

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I know that you've probably heard me mindset that you had at that point in time and a mindset that doesn't go away.

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It sticks with you, that you have to overcome on a regular basis.

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Now you mentioned this inner armor.

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Let's jump right into that, leading us in when you use the term or title inner armor.

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What is inner armor?

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I think you mentioned mental toughness, but tell me more about how you define that.

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Yeah, it is, it's.

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I used to use the I, you know, I, my, my company or my firm, you know, is mental toughness training center.

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So for the long time, you know, for the last I don't know, you know decade, I was mental toughness.

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Mental toughness because I'm training SEALs and Marines and Rangers.

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I'm coming out of that I was with a private military contractor, with the state department, so mental toughness.

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But as I got going and I brought this to corporate, I began to think a lot of people see, even in those circles SEALs, marines, rangers, athletes we've kind of confused physical toughness with mental toughness.

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So a lot of people think if I just do one more push up, or I'm going the extra mile or I'm going to grit, that's physical toughness.

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Mental toughness is getting control of your mind and your will and emotions right.

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So this inner armor is how do I control my mind, will and emotions?

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How do I?

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And that's what resilience I call perpetual resilience, because also a lot of people have this concept that resilience is I bounce back after something bad happened, then I'll find out if I had it or not, you know, and it's like no, I want this like perpetual all the time, like if it's proactive resilience.

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Right, I build this muscle.

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Then when stuff happens, I'm not even bouncing back, I'm rebooting and get it, I'm better, I make the course correction and I do better than I was when I got knocked down.

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But that that system is already in place, that inner armor.

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So it's not about.

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I mean we're all going to take hits in life, we all know this.

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I mean, stuff happens all the time, so it's not the, it's not the hit.

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It's like how well can you take the hit and keep going on mission with your purpose?

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What's your mission in life?

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What's your purpose?

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And that's a big piece of resilience.

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Because I have a 300 year plan.

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Like my ultimate target will take me 300.

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People are like, well, don't count me out first off.

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But but right, it's a multi-generational plan, it would take me 300 years to accomplish.

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So the reason I have my perspective that far out, because if, if I have a 300 year plan, I know it's going to take me 300 years to reach my I call it the Emerald city right, the Emerald city.

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Take me 300 years, like, if I have a bad day, who cares?

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I'm still on the yellow brick road and I know why I'm going there, right?

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So, like scarecrow was going because he wanted a brain, lion was going because he wanted Kurt, right, they're all going.

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You know, dorothy wanted to go home, but we also, and there's like flying monkeys and bad weather and poppy fields and all these obstacles Right, but they are, but nothing stopped them and they would get knocked down and just keep going to the Emerald city, right?

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So that's what we want to do, and I don't.

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If I have that perspective, my inner armor is that flying monkeys aren't going to bother me, and you know bad storms and you know bumps in the road or even witches trying to kill me.

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I don't, you know, it's like you know.

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So that's what the inner armor is, right.

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So it's, it's about changing our perspective, knowing where we're going, what our purpose is, what our identity is, what my mission in life is, and then you can handle all these things that come up.

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They're just really.

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All these things that come up really boil down to a minor inconvenience when I look at them in light of my 300-year plan.

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Love that and I think about that.

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I've used the term.

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I want to impact people for 10 generations to come.

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So I'm with you on the 300-year plan.

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I think that's something that becomes a powerful understanding.

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And look, let's go back to the Bible, I mean Old Testament.

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They live pretty close to 300 anyway.

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You never know what's going to happen.

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Methuselah Moses, we're only halfway, at a minimum.

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We're only halfway there.

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And we're getting better with medical science too.

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Exactly right.

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I keep hearing all these things just last one more year, and that's going to add 50 years for us.

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If we can just last one more year, and that's going to add 50 years for us.

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If we can just last one more year, we'll see how it goes.

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So I love the analogy of the Wizard Oz and using that in the Yellow Brick Road and knowing what each of them knew, what they wanted.

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So you know who are the individuals that you wrote this book for, who are the scarecrows and the Dorothys and the cowardly lions that you wrote this book for, and why did you write it now?

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Why now was the right time.

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That's just a great question.

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So right around, right before COVID hit, the chaplain of the Marine Corps called me and he said he'd been tasked by the commandant to find a way to deal with PTSD and the suicide rates that are going on in the ranks.

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They tried therapy, they tried drugs.

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Nothing is working.

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The numbers are still going up.

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What could you do?

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And so you know, because I had six years in Marine Corps infantry and I'm still plugged into.

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You know, my platoon commander was a two star general at the time.

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My company commander is a retired lieutenant colonel but he's involved in career transition and helping wounded warriors.

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He's and he's plugged in with that.

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So we I just began to say, how can we make this work?

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So my flagship system of grounds, your leadership CEO, it's all we dig into the science of it and it's a corporate coaching and it's like 12 weeks and you're going to spend an hour every day in there with me and the Marine Corps don't have time for that.

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So how do I put this thing together?

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So Inner Armor was built to be like a workout of the day for these guys, so that you just you know here let me look on my phone.

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Here's, I call it the mental toughness minute or whatever, right, and I'm doing these drills, these, doing these resilience drills.

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I'm building this resilience muscle, or this inner armor muscle, whether it's.

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You know, we talked about the eight cylinders of your life.

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Right, we can get into that, but each day we're hitting another cylinder.

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Is it my mental health?

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Is it my physical health?

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Is it my emotional health?

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Is it my social health?

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Right, and so on.

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So that's what this book was.

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So we did that and went through the beta testing.

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Everything was doing great, and then the commandant's changed.

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A new commandant came in.

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He's like, you know, we don't care about that.

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So that went out the window.

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But then I started using it for law enforcement and firefighters.

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And I kind of say this in the press release when they quoted me saying this, because when I was a street cop and I started in Spartanburg County, my PTSD levels were way higher as a street cop than we were in any of my 11 deployments, whether it was Desert Storm or Republic of Panama, counterterrorism in Honduras or the State Department, four tours in Afghanistan, and they were like well.

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Why I'm like well?

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Because you never leave the combat zone.

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Really, I lock a guy up yesterday.

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He's out on bail and I see him at the grocery store.

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I'm pushing the baby in the stroller.

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That's I mean.

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I'm on red alert.

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Afghanistan, I'm on a three, 36 hour flight, right, so I can decompress.

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So this thing was written for that and it also works for law enforcement.

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I thought now's the time.

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I mean the chaos, john, the chaos on the planet right now.

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I mean in everything economic chaos, political chaos, leadership chaos, I mean cultural chaos.

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Just pick a country, it doesn't matter, we're in chaos.

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And I thought let me put this thing out and get it down to at least this book.

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So there's 23 chapters and they're all like.

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I say it's tactical because it's literally it's.

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I'm going to have it stack two or three minutes a day and work on these things.

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And if you just went through one a week and, like, practice it every week for that drill then moved on to the next one that you ran through this book two times in a year, you're going to be your inner armor is going to be rock solid.

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It's going to be habit.

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It's going to be rock solid.

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It's going to be habit.

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It's going to be your programming, it's going to be your default mode, right?

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So, and that was the goal, that's why we wrote it and it was written for, I guess you know, 18 to 38 year olds.

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You know, in the Marine Corps.

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Well, as I've gone through it, I mean, and just each one of those chapters, I actually love that description because I see them as frameworks.

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You talked about those being structures or frameworks or habits, and they build on each other.

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No doubt about it.

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But before we get to some of those, because we'll talk about those as solutions, but let's talk about these flying monkeys and these witches and the wizard that kind of gets in the way when you're working with these guys, realizing, focused on military and even the police force now, in terms of where you are.

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But let's just you can use the leadership in general and the chaos that we're going through.

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What are some of the barriers, these flying monkeys that these folks are running into that keep them from, in essence, getting to where they want to go?

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I think, because of the way the human, I call it biopsychology how does the body, mind and emotions all work together or against each other?

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And what we found out, you know, when we're looking at the medical science and the neuroscience and brain imaging and mapping and how hormones actually are, mimic the neurons in you know the neurotransmitters.

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They mimic the neurotransmitters in your brain.

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So when you filter someone, you perceive something.

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The chemical that is called up in that, when you're perceiving it is, it mimics the hormone, right.

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So what I call it the hormone dump, right?

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So if you ever been in a near car accident, right, where you know the slam, the brakes, horns are honked, but nothing's happened.

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But then afterwards then your heart starts pounding right, and you're like, oh my gosh, there's no logical reason because everybody's safe.

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That's the hormone dump.

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And so that's what happens every time there's a stressor, whether it's combat, leadership, it doesn't matter.

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Like I mean, when you're running your business, I mean, you know, my sons were running a pharmaceutical manufacturing firm, and like, every day you're coming in, you're like, you feel like you're Jack Sparrow, stop blowing holes in my ship.

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You know what I mean.

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Like I may, and that was worse to me than being in combat, because in combat, at least I could, you know I'm I have a way to fight back.

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I have rules of engagement.

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There's things you could do, but in business you're just like all right, we just lost that contract or the supplier, the tariffs happened and now the shipping's backed up and you're not getting the raw material so you can get your product out.

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These are massive stressors.

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So how do I respond to these things?

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These are the witches and the flying monkeys that are out there today in the chaos.

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Hey, uncommon Leaders, hope you're enjoying the episode.

00:12:42.392 --> 00:12:42.851
So far.

00:12:42.851 --> 00:12:46.474
I believe in doing business with people you like and trust, and not just a company name.

00:12:46.474 --> 00:12:50.976
That's why a strong personal brand is essential, whether you're an entrepreneur or a leader within a company.

00:12:50.976 --> 00:12:58.306
Brand Builders Group, the folks who have been helping me refine my own personal brand are offering a free consultation call with one of their expert brand strategists.

00:12:58.306 --> 00:13:04.424
They'll help you identify your uniqueness, craft a compelling story and develop a step-by-step plan to elevate your impact.

00:13:04.424 --> 00:13:15.181
So head on over to coachjohngallaghercom slash bbg, as in brand builders group, to schedule your free call and take the first step toward building a personal brand that gets you noticed for all the right reasons.

00:13:15.181 --> 00:13:18.648
That's coachjohngallaghercom slash bbg.

00:13:18.969 --> 00:13:20.371
Now let's get back to the episode.

00:13:20.371 --> 00:13:21.880
Love that and again.

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There are things that exist and we're going to get a chance to talk about movies here in a little bit, but I just got a chance to watch again my favorite movie.

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If I'm flipping around between a few channels in the evening and a few good men comes on, I got to stop.

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I'm done.

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I'm done for the next hour and 45 minutes until I hear Jack Nicholson say we follow orders or people die.

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I mean it's something that's always been there for me, my favorite line is I would just prefer you said thank you and went about it.

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Yeah, right, otherwise, grab a weapon and stand up.

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Grab a weapon right.

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Who's going to do it?

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You, kathy, you Weinberg, right.

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Don't get me quoted movies, john, but it is a great mental toughness game.

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We got one, I think scene right.

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I mean, I, just I, that's.

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All I need to see is that last few minutes, and I love when the Instagram.

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Now I've seen the recent Instagram.

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I will time ourselves, but the the baby memes or whatever that are popping up in that scene and babies doing it.

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It's just, it's just driving me nuts.

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Okay, so you talked about some of those barriers that exist, those things that are going on, but you've got these frameworks.

00:14:20.163 --> 00:14:27.215
So there are a couple that have caught my eye, mostly because of the name of them, but helping me specifically in terms of area where I see weakness as well.

00:14:27.215 --> 00:14:29.248
But you said something about the two-minute rule.

00:14:29.248 --> 00:14:32.269
Tell me about the two-minute rule and what helps there.

00:14:32.539 --> 00:14:33.625
That's where we start everything.

00:14:33.625 --> 00:14:34.804
I start every training with that.

00:14:34.804 --> 00:14:43.389
And I ask I'm just going to you know we're going to do how I do it right, because I have to walk you down the psychological path Could you suspend your disbelief for two minutes, right?

00:14:43.389 --> 00:14:45.471
And then people look at me like, well, I don't even know what that means.

00:14:45.471 --> 00:14:47.592
And I'm like, well, have you ever watched a movie that you liked?

00:14:47.592 --> 00:14:50.836
Yes, everybody says yeah, okay, congratulations.

00:14:50.836 --> 00:14:54.586
You suspended your disbelief for at least an hour and a half, because you know those aren't real.

00:14:54.586 --> 00:14:56.801
Even the ones based on a true story are Hollywood.

00:14:56.801 --> 00:14:57.461
It up, right?

00:14:57.461 --> 00:15:00.063
So you suspended your disbelief in order to enjoy this show.

00:15:00.063 --> 00:15:02.426
So I'm not asking you to do anything you're not already doing.

00:15:02.426 --> 00:15:03.066
It's normal.

00:15:03.066 --> 00:15:04.287
You do this all the time.

00:15:04.967 --> 00:15:12.433
But when you hear that voice of resistance in your head that says I can't do this, we can't do that, it's impossible, this is hard.

00:15:12.433 --> 00:15:14.255
Be like, hey, look just for two minutes.

00:15:14.255 --> 00:15:15.496
Just like, have fantasy.

00:15:15.496 --> 00:15:19.582
I'm not arguing, I'm not saying it's not impossible, but I'm asking you for two minutes.

00:15:19.582 --> 00:15:22.849
Just say, if it were possible, how would I do it?

00:15:22.849 --> 00:15:23.769
Right?

00:15:23.769 --> 00:15:26.575
And what it does is it gives your brain permission to go find the answer.

00:15:26.575 --> 00:15:29.369
If it were possible, how would we do it?

00:15:29.369 --> 00:15:32.068
I mean, I've done that in meetings, where you just throw that out on the table.

00:15:32.068 --> 00:15:35.440
I mean something that was, you know, 30 seconds ago, impossible.

00:15:35.440 --> 00:15:47.375
Now we have five different options we could actually look at, and maybe they're not all viable, but maybe we take a piece of one and a piece of the other and we're like a chef and we take a piece of everybody's you know what they would be possible and come up with a plan of attack.

00:15:47.375 --> 00:15:53.182
You know so I think that's a game changer if you could just implement that and that's one of the one of that.

00:15:53.283 --> 00:15:57.052
You know that two minute drill that I talk about every day, not the two minute rule, but to drill it.

00:15:57.052 --> 00:16:00.950
So think about this here's, here's how, for all your listeners, how could I do this right now?

00:16:00.950 --> 00:16:05.100
Think about one thing that just frustrates you, like regularly.

00:16:05.100 --> 00:16:08.750
Is it like the traffic in Atlanta while you're driving on your commute?

00:16:08.750 --> 00:16:09.572
You know what are DC.

00:16:09.572 --> 00:16:12.846
Is it like the overload on the inbox, is it?

00:16:12.846 --> 00:16:13.788
You know that.

00:16:13.788 --> 00:16:22.265
You know, colleague, that you know you don't like their cologne, or they're always you know well whoever's frustrated and then ask yourself think about this, this is my two minute drill, like I'm while I'm brushing my teeth.

00:16:22.265 --> 00:16:23.288
This is habit stacking.

00:16:23.288 --> 00:16:24.309
I habit brush my teeth.

00:16:24.730 --> 00:16:33.472
Now I'm going to think about that thing that was triggers me and I'm saying, look, if it were possible for me to handle this with poise, how would I do it?

00:16:33.472 --> 00:16:35.827
And then begin to answer that question while I'm brushing my teeth?

00:16:35.827 --> 00:16:37.182
Well, I can take a deep breath.

00:16:37.182 --> 00:16:54.567
You know I can't control that For me, for traffic, my answer to that question was to make my car and now I'm dating myself, but it was cassettes back in the day.

00:16:54.567 --> 00:17:01.110
It would be like a college classroom where I'm putting in cassettes on neuroscience or psychology or leadership or communication.

00:17:01.110 --> 00:17:06.522
Pretty soon my commute in DC when I was a federal agent was, you know, it was a nightmare.

00:17:06.522 --> 00:17:12.288
But until I did that, and then I it was like not long enough because I would sit in the parking lot, I'd have to finish a lecture.

00:17:12.288 --> 00:17:12.829
You know what I mean.

00:17:12.829 --> 00:17:19.307
So this is what this when you ask that question and you give yourself permission to answer it, all kinds of great things happen for you.

00:17:20.920 --> 00:17:23.583
Wait, no, I think about that and as you touched on a little bit.

00:17:23.583 --> 00:17:39.378
I think about that and as you touched on a little bit, as maybe I transition a little bit from the book to you is that many leaders also want to believe that once I get the discipline and I do it once or twice, that these limiting beliefs will go away.

00:17:39.398 --> 00:17:43.292
Yeah, and they don't.

00:17:43.292 --> 00:17:45.019
What did I just say about always looking in the mirror?

00:17:45.019 --> 00:17:45.119
What?

00:17:45.260 --> 00:17:48.210
is the specific habit you use to manage those limiting beliefs that you have.

00:17:49.121 --> 00:17:49.943
So this is huge.

00:17:49.943 --> 00:18:04.888
What I'm about to tell you is, literally, it's the game changer of all humans and it doesn't matter what your belief system is, I don't care what you believe, but you have to vet your belief and then, once you do and you know that it's real, then you can anchor yourself in it and I call it the identity statement.

00:18:04.888 --> 00:18:07.772
Right, who are you when you take away?

00:18:07.772 --> 00:18:09.740
Not your, because a lot of people I say who are you?

00:18:09.740 --> 00:18:11.186
They're like, and this is a huge.

00:18:11.186 --> 00:18:13.596
You know I'm david seal, like oh, I'm a cop.

00:18:13.596 --> 00:18:15.182
You know I'm street cop, I'm the gangs.

00:18:15.182 --> 00:18:18.289
You know I'm like no, that's not your resume is not who you are.

00:18:18.371 --> 00:18:19.621
What you do is not who you are.

00:18:19.621 --> 00:18:25.070
Our bio and in our industry, john, right, we have to have the bio so it gives us credibility, so we can even get on the show, right.

00:18:25.070 --> 00:18:26.614
So you go oh, he's a Marine Corps vet.

00:18:26.614 --> 00:18:28.207
He's a, you know, capitol Police agent.

00:18:28.207 --> 00:18:31.089
He was, you know right, phd in theology, all these things.

00:18:31.089 --> 00:18:32.463
But that's not who I am.

00:18:32.463 --> 00:18:33.448
You strip all those away.

00:18:33.448 --> 00:18:34.726
Who am I when those are gone?

00:18:35.140 --> 00:18:48.801
So this is the baseline program and so I came up with an identity statement of the characteristics, the internals, the values of who I wanted to be right now and who I aspired to be right.

00:18:48.801 --> 00:18:49.744
Where do I want to go?

00:18:49.744 --> 00:18:54.680
So it's kind of half a faith statement and do it in one sentence.

00:18:54.680 --> 00:19:05.409
It's got to be very short and pithy and quick so I can repeat it, and it's got to be when I hit my foot on the driveway and stubbed my toe, what needs to come out as my identity statement?

00:19:05.409 --> 00:19:08.032
When I hit my hand with a hammer, right, what comes out?

00:19:08.032 --> 00:19:12.865
So my identity statement is that I'm a man of excellence who always keeps his word.

00:19:12.865 --> 00:19:21.752
So once, that's who Andrew is, whether he's being a dad or a husband or the CEO of my company, or the little league coach or a PTA volunteer, right?

00:19:21.752 --> 00:19:26.942
Or the usher at church, whatever I'm, whatever, I have to give my best effort because I'm a man of excellence.

00:19:26.942 --> 00:19:30.182
That's already pre-decided I use that word a lot in the book pre-decide.

00:19:30.182 --> 00:19:33.012
So now every decision in my life is made.

00:19:33.012 --> 00:19:37.146
I don't have to sit at the drive-through looking at the menu options, right?

00:19:37.146 --> 00:19:38.210
Because how many times you do that?

00:19:38.210 --> 00:19:41.449
Oh, hang on, give me a minute, right, or you're stuck behind the person doing that, right.

00:19:41.449 --> 00:19:50.371
So I already know I'm a man of excellence.

00:19:50.371 --> 00:19:53.330
So I cannot half-step, I can't phone in the effort I'm not going to, you know, show up unprepared, I can't do it.

00:19:53.330 --> 00:19:53.559
It's not who I am.

00:19:53.559 --> 00:20:00.631
And if I did, then I and then I'd be like well, is that who?

00:20:00.631 --> 00:20:01.471
Is that who you are?

00:20:01.471 --> 00:20:02.712
Well, no, that's not who Andrew is.

00:20:02.752 --> 00:20:03.594
Ever not kept your word?

00:20:03.594 --> 00:20:05.335
Well, of course, man, we're humans.

00:20:05.335 --> 00:20:08.820
There's only one guy that kept his word the whole time on the planet.

00:20:08.820 --> 00:20:10.424
We killed him because he was perfect, right?

00:20:10.424 --> 00:20:14.161
So that so, but I aspire to that that always keep my word.

00:20:14.161 --> 00:20:16.443
So I'm getting very good at it.

00:20:16.483 --> 00:20:22.172
But how to get good at it is not to give your word that much Cause the more you give it, the harder it is to keep it.

00:20:22.172 --> 00:20:26.040
And so, yeah, it's easy and feels good at the time to say yes to everybody.

00:20:26.040 --> 00:20:32.821
But it's pre-decided that I have this triage right of who I give my word to and what I'm going to do.

00:20:32.821 --> 00:20:39.325
Because if I say I'm going to do something at a certain time, I'm going to do it Like that's what it is, that's who Andrew is.

00:20:39.325 --> 00:20:42.092
There's no backdoor option, there's no highway option.

00:20:42.692 --> 00:20:47.786
And I you know that one of my favorite Psalm says that we swear to our own hurt and change not right.

00:20:47.786 --> 00:20:55.382
And when you know like when I took the oath at you know Capitol police, I took the oath in the Marine Corps you swear to your own hurt and you change not even if it hurts you, right.

00:20:55.382 --> 00:20:59.486
So when I keep my word, I can't change, even if it costs me money.

00:20:59.486 --> 00:21:01.929
Or, and then learn from that course, correct?

00:21:01.929 --> 00:21:08.717
Well, don't give your word next time I'm not telling the neighbor, yeah, I'll help you move, and then be complaining the whole time I'm helping him move.

00:21:08.717 --> 00:21:15.406
Or don't do it and then duck the neighbor for the next 10 days because I told him I would help him and then I didn't.

00:21:15.406 --> 00:21:17.718
Are you following that, that kind?

00:21:17.738 --> 00:21:18.279
of thing right there.

00:21:18.279 --> 00:21:25.472
I love the idea of again the two-part statement as well, in terms of stating that the man of excellence right off the bat.

00:21:25.472 --> 00:21:27.384
That is like a commitment that I'm making.

00:21:27.384 --> 00:21:38.867
But even to your point, that aspirational statement of I always keep my word, knowing that it will be difficult, but I always aspire to do that, and it gives you a filter in each one of those opportunities that comes through.

00:21:38.867 --> 00:21:41.563
I mean, there's so many different paths you could take right off of that.

00:21:41.563 --> 00:21:45.829
With regards to people ask you to do things, you're like hey, yeah, oh, yeah, I'll do that, no problem.

00:21:45.829 --> 00:21:51.605
And 48 hours later we find out that we didn't get that thing done because we really didn't have the time.

00:21:51.605 --> 00:21:55.862
Or, frankly, we recognize that it wasn't that important to us.

00:21:55.862 --> 00:21:57.906
Anything we say yes to, we say no to something else.

00:21:57.926 --> 00:22:01.742
Whatever those paths that you end up walking down are very important.

00:22:01.742 --> 00:22:05.528
So one more question on the book, and then I'm going to dive into you just a little bit.

00:22:05.528 --> 00:22:07.973
Sure, I often talk about the book test.

00:22:07.973 --> 00:22:10.566
So someone's going to read your book, and it's been out for a couple of months now.

00:22:10.566 --> 00:22:13.984
Someone's going to read your book, though, and they're going to go through.

00:22:13.984 --> 00:22:14.527
You mentioned this.

00:22:14.527 --> 00:22:18.026
If you go through it twice when you do those things, how much change can happen?

00:22:18.026 --> 00:22:21.551
But they put it on the bookshelf, like the bookshelf that's behind me, and they see that.

00:22:21.551 --> 00:22:23.153
They only see the binding, and they look at it.

00:22:23.153 --> 00:22:28.896
You know, six, eight months later, what do you want them to think, what do you want them to feel when they see that book after they've read it?

00:22:29.457 --> 00:22:30.698
I feel like I need to get back into that.

00:22:30.698 --> 00:22:34.827
So this is the thing it's you never can, you can never get your foot off the gas.

00:22:34.827 --> 00:22:38.643
So the discipline is the it's a journey, and discipline means that that's.

00:22:38.643 --> 00:22:41.448
You know that, you do it every day and it'll slip.

00:22:41.448 --> 00:22:43.611
As a human machine, we know it slips.

00:22:43.611 --> 00:22:44.492
These things slip.

00:22:44.492 --> 00:22:45.494
I mean even I do.

00:22:45.579 --> 00:22:46.402
I wrote the book right.

00:22:46.402 --> 00:22:51.083
I've been in the, you know, and if you don't stay on it every day, things slip.

00:22:51.083 --> 00:22:58.583
You know I'm like, oh man, you know that's just slipped through my fingers, you know, and you let it go because you get busy and things happen and your focus shifts to something else.

00:22:58.583 --> 00:23:01.371
So I want to keep doing is being deliberate with my focus.

00:23:01.371 --> 00:23:08.167
Like this thing, this book, really, I mean, if you go through it twice a year, I'm going to tell you.

00:23:08.167 --> 00:23:11.925
It's like I was telling one of my I have like there's like a 12-year-old that looks up to me.

00:23:11.965 --> 00:23:12.407
What do you do?

00:23:12.407 --> 00:23:16.201
I'm like man, when I was 12, I started reading one Proverbs every day.

00:23:16.201 --> 00:23:18.868
For whatever day the date was, there's 31 Proverbs.

00:23:18.868 --> 00:23:21.333
They're like really, I'm like, yeah, I said I've probably read it a hundred times.

00:23:21.333 --> 00:23:24.374
I can almost probably tell I've never stopped reading every day.

00:23:24.374 --> 00:23:30.717
I'm going to get in there and find out that you know what unjust weight you know unjust business practices are scamming.

00:23:30.717 --> 00:23:32.637
Somebody never works out good Like you need to.

00:23:32.637 --> 00:23:35.346
I would never do that, but people do.

00:23:35.346 --> 00:23:36.008
They let it slip.

00:23:36.008 --> 00:23:37.612
People that I knew would never do that.

00:23:37.612 --> 00:23:54.400
I look at them and then 20 years later they're like you know what I'm talking about, john, where you see somebody, they start out strong out the gate and then 20 years later it's like it's almost like a tire out of round right.

00:23:54.420 --> 00:23:56.489
Have you ever had that where your tires like out of it's like a wobbling little Shake your teeth out.

00:23:56.548 --> 00:23:56.931
Absolutely Right.

00:23:56.931 --> 00:23:59.319
But at 25 miles an hour it's not that big of a deal.

00:23:59.319 --> 00:24:06.730
But when you get on the highway and you're driving to Chicago from Florida and you're doing 80 miles an hour on the interstate, that thing is just, like you said, shaking your teeth.

00:24:06.730 --> 00:24:10.816
I kind of see that in the human condition.

00:24:10.816 --> 00:24:13.365
That's what happens if you don't stay on it.

00:24:13.365 --> 00:24:19.109
That's why I love guys like Nick Saban and Tom Brady so much, because you can win one time Congratulations.

00:24:19.109 --> 00:24:21.845
I was talking about this to another guy just the other day.

00:24:21.845 --> 00:24:27.019
When the quarterback, think about this, when the quarterback gets that big, you know, 100 million, 150 million.

00:24:27.099 --> 00:24:28.516
Yeah, the second, the third contract, yeah.

00:24:28.657 --> 00:24:36.701
Yeah, what happens to their performance as soon as they get it Like this is not made up, it's not anecdotal, there's empirical data that shows when they get the contract.

00:24:36.701 --> 00:24:38.482
And it's coaches too right.

00:24:38.482 --> 00:24:46.230
That's why, like Nick Saban, I look at this guy and he's like mad because we just won a national championship but we're already behind three weeks on recruiting for next year.

00:24:46.230 --> 00:24:49.232
People are you're crazy, like like that's how you have to be.

00:24:49.232 --> 00:24:50.173
Like Tom Brady.

00:24:50.173 --> 00:24:53.195
He's like I love Tom Brady because he's Forrest Gump Right.

00:24:53.215 --> 00:25:01.403
He got picked last for kickball, he was like one ninety ninth in the draft, publicly Right, but he's a grinder.

00:25:01.403 --> 00:25:01.624
He's not.

00:25:01.624 --> 00:25:01.923
He's like me.

00:25:01.923 --> 00:25:04.387
I'm not talented, I'm not smart, he just grinds Right and he gets coaching and he's a coachable guy.

00:25:04.387 --> 00:25:05.108
And you just and you stay at it.

00:25:05.108 --> 00:25:10.003
No one's going to outwork you and you keep working, working and you don't do what he did Like.

00:25:10.003 --> 00:25:11.448
It's very rare how many of them.

00:25:11.448 --> 00:25:15.482
There may be another guy that did it, like Joe Montana, or there may be somebody in the future, I don't know.

00:25:15.482 --> 00:25:33.673
But he 24, seven, with the nutrition and the sleep, rest and the what's you know, honing my skills and and if we want to get to that level, you have to do those things, to you know, to produce that success.

00:25:33.673 --> 00:25:34.778
And I want long-term success.

00:25:34.778 --> 00:25:36.202
I don't want to be a flash in the pan.

00:25:37.346 --> 00:25:41.361
So you are a man of excellence and you aspire to always keep your word.

00:25:41.361 --> 00:25:49.353
And you mentioned, like Brady's and Saban's, like they had some rituals or whatever those words, disciplines, habits to be successful.

00:25:49.513 --> 00:25:49.753
What are?

00:25:49.794 --> 00:26:00.691
those one or two Craig Rochelle calls them cornerstone habits that you do on a daily basis, that ensure that it sets you up for a day of success, or you know that has to happen.

00:26:01.039 --> 00:26:02.701
I call them my non-negotiables, right?

00:26:02.701 --> 00:26:08.048
So, if I set these things up as non-negotiable, and so we talked about the eight cylinders, right so I know.

00:26:08.048 --> 00:26:10.549
So I just for your listeners if they haven't read the book.

00:26:10.549 --> 00:26:21.201
The eight cylinders are your spiritual health, your physical health, your mental health, your emotional health, your social health, harmonious relationships, financial health, cultural health how are you affecting the culture?

00:26:21.201 --> 00:26:23.324
And then your professional health, right?

00:26:23.324 --> 00:26:30.792
So, in, order and balance is what we should be going for, because there's people that are great in one and then the rest of their lives are like that, tire out of round, right?

00:26:30.792 --> 00:26:32.555
So I try to.

00:26:32.555 --> 00:26:37.711
You know, what I do is I have non-negotiables for each of these to stay in bounds.

00:26:37.711 --> 00:26:39.196
Right so, stay balanced.

00:26:39.196 --> 00:26:43.923
So every day I'm up when my feet hit the ground, I'm already saying the thing.

00:26:43.923 --> 00:26:44.884
I say this thing.

00:26:44.884 --> 00:27:04.688
I've been saying it since like 1997, and it takes me two minutes to go through it, and it's why you know you're doing your morning routine, you're going to the bathroom, you're you know shaving, you're brushing your teeth, you're getting your hair done, and I'm saying these things out loud.

00:27:04.688 --> 00:27:13.042
So my it's about my identity, it's about who's in charge of the day, and I mean, listen, this is a faith-based show.

00:27:13.042 --> 00:27:14.768
You don't mind we could talk about it.

00:27:14.768 --> 00:27:19.207
I say the Ephesians prayer and I say a heavenly nature prayer and then I say a prayer.

00:27:19.207 --> 00:27:23.150
I declare things over my body, what I want my body to do, right.

00:27:23.150 --> 00:27:31.184
So I put on my heavenly nature, I'm a participant of the divine nature, and then I want a spirit of wisdom and revealed knowledge, and you know the eyes of my understanding enlightened.

00:27:31.184 --> 00:27:36.002
And at the end of that Ephesians prayer, in chapter three, he says and that we would be filled with the fullness of God.

00:27:36.002 --> 00:27:39.046
Right, I mean, if you're filled with the fullness of God, can you get any better?

00:27:39.046 --> 00:27:39.707
I mean, that's it.

00:27:39.707 --> 00:27:42.990
So that's what I also pray for my kids and I pray for my wife.

00:27:42.990 --> 00:27:48.986
And if somebody's mean to me in the street, I'm like, all right, let's just pray for them, you know, but talk bad, let's pray the Ephesians prayer for them.

00:27:48.986 --> 00:27:51.059
I mean, like you know what I'm saying.

00:27:51.059 --> 00:27:53.228
So that's one of those things that non-negotiable.

00:27:53.228 --> 00:27:56.565
And it only takes me like two minutes and then I get up.

00:27:56.565 --> 00:28:08.512
It doesn't matter what time I have to get three, because I'm going to spend an hour in the Word, in meditation, in what I call private worship right.

00:28:08.512 --> 00:28:09.356
That's what the Greek word for prayer is.

00:28:09.356 --> 00:28:09.858
Is private worship right.

00:28:09.858 --> 00:28:11.605
So I'm going to have my private worship time.

00:28:11.605 --> 00:28:12.467
It's non-negotiable.

00:28:12.467 --> 00:28:13.691
It's my spiritual cylinder.

00:28:13.691 --> 00:28:21.383
I've got to stay rooted and grounded right, and I'm going to be strengthened with might in my inner man by his Spirit, right, that's part of that.

00:28:21.403 --> 00:28:22.285
Ephesians prayer, prayer.

00:28:22.285 --> 00:28:22.965
So I'm gonna do that.

00:28:22.965 --> 00:28:26.731
And then proverbs is part of the thing and I'm gonna read something, whatever.

00:28:26.731 --> 00:28:29.286
Whatever is on my mind to read that day, it might be all right, I gotta read.

00:28:29.286 --> 00:28:32.321
You know, I haven't been to psalm 91 in a while, safety right.

00:28:32.321 --> 00:28:42.608
Or I'm gonna read something out of the epistles, or I love camping out in the gospel of john, you know, and seeing I mean romans, you can't, I mean like dude, I love him, I could live in in Romans 8 and 12.

00:28:42.869 --> 00:28:43.851
All day long, absolutely.

00:28:43.851 --> 00:28:47.421
John 15, romans 8, all day long.

00:28:47.701 --> 00:28:47.863
Right.

00:28:47.863 --> 00:28:51.771
So we just keep reminding ourselves of those things and then I work out.

00:28:51.771 --> 00:28:54.566
Now the workout is a physical workout.

00:28:54.566 --> 00:29:04.030
I mean it's one hour of strength training and I still do an MMA routine in between the sets, so it's a HIIT workout.

00:29:04.030 --> 00:29:14.638
I get my heart rate up, I'm doing my strength training, I'm also doing my cardio and I'm keeping my fighting skills up, my physical skills, as my heart, one of my hard skills, non-negotiable, I mean it's.

00:29:14.659 --> 00:29:17.222
I mean, in fact, it's so hard for me to take a rest day, like some.

00:29:17.222 --> 00:29:20.686
I mean I, I literally had to make myself take a rest day the other day as I was worn down.

00:29:20.686 --> 00:29:21.567
I'm like what is going on?

00:29:21.567 --> 00:29:29.825
I'm like it's been like 17 days since I took a day off from working out, cause that's such a habit, like you have to like make yourself rest, you know, and I don't.

00:29:29.825 --> 00:29:42.615
I mean I was like I did some cross training, which I would count as rest day, but it's not really, cause my cross training is I throw a, a weighted you know body armor vest on and go for, you know, four mile hike with, you know, with a weighted ruck.

00:29:42.654 --> 00:29:44.695
Right so and that's like that's my rest day.

00:29:44.695 --> 00:29:45.996
I'm like why didn't lift weights today?

00:29:45.996 --> 00:29:47.616
And I get my kids are like you're like Texas.

00:29:47.696 --> 00:29:49.376
Everything is over, done yeah.

00:29:49.698 --> 00:29:51.137
Yeah, so that's you know.

00:29:51.137 --> 00:29:52.218
Then those are those you know.

00:29:52.218 --> 00:29:54.683
And then every night, every night, I hit the rack.

00:29:54.683 --> 00:30:07.817
Let's go to bed Sorry, you got to hit the rack at night, right, and I'm reading an hour professional skills every night for an hour.

00:30:07.817 --> 00:30:09.337
Where would you be in five years?

00:30:09.780 --> 00:30:11.066
So, and I studied the neuroscience.

00:30:11.066 --> 00:30:12.682
I did all that and I found myself.

00:30:12.682 --> 00:30:15.570
I was on the international stage as the mental toughness guy.

00:30:15.570 --> 00:30:16.181
I mean.

00:30:16.181 --> 00:30:30.240
I had in 2019, they, you know, I had this 350 Greek CEOs, the CEO club, the Greece called me and brought me over there for a week of training and Forbes is interviewing me and literally in the Greek, it says this guy wrote the book on mental toughness, I mean.

00:30:30.240 --> 00:30:51.859
And then you're in Australia doing the Today Extra show, when I had the parenting book out, and all of a sudden you find yourself Like it's not marketing, it's not like a shtick, it's just that you dig this deep well of professional skill knowledge and it and mine, it was neuroscience and psychology, biopsychology, performance science.

00:30:51.859 --> 00:30:54.748
How does it all you know and and it does mix with theology?

00:30:54.748 --> 00:30:58.306
Because theology is the study of God and psychology is the study of the soul.

00:30:58.306 --> 00:30:59.871
So there's a lot of crossover there.

00:31:01.480 --> 00:31:02.241
So I love that.

00:31:02.241 --> 00:31:24.189
I mean, first of all, thank you for sharing that, and I think there are many of those things that people would say they try and they don't have the time to do it, and it's so, so hard to respond with grace to that and ask them where they want to be in the future, but to give them the truth that they need to hear, that they need to become that disciplined and I've had to change many different ways inside of that.

00:31:29.599 --> 00:31:38.546
You mentioned the neuropsychology side as well and it's like again, you've gone from this kid who was overweight, bullied in high school to signing up for the Marines, you know, to the special, what we call special forces, or into the police.

00:31:38.546 --> 00:31:55.469
Yeah, Like, where did the desire, where did the interest for you know the neuropsychology side of it come in and then you made a decision to do that it's kind of always been my obsession, but I really were, I really so the marine corps, I got my physical cylinder under control right.

00:31:55.489 --> 00:31:56.961
So I'm 18, I finally get my physical.

00:31:56.961 --> 00:32:13.135
Then I I meet my smoking hot wife and she was 19 when we got married and I was 21 and I'm a corporal and you know, I'm just like you know, and the Marine Corps likes to keep you angry all the time because you're a warrior, you know, and that's what we're trying to do is just keep you mad all the time.

00:32:13.135 --> 00:32:19.441
So I would come home and I would talk to her in the same tone of voice, I would talk to my marines and my infantry right.

00:32:19.601 --> 00:32:23.707
she's like listen, I'm not one of your marines and if you want to stay with me, you better get that squared away.

00:32:23.707 --> 00:32:28.535
I got a cast iron frying pan and I'll use it and you have to sleep sometime.

00:32:28.535 --> 00:32:31.828
And I she's five, three and 110 soaking wet and I thought she was serious.

00:32:31.828 --> 00:32:33.622
You know I'm like, oh my gosh, I think she's serious.

00:32:33.622 --> 00:32:39.107
So my target went, uh, suddenly became how do I have a great relationship with my wife?

00:32:39.107 --> 00:32:39.648
You know what I mean?

00:32:39.669 --> 00:32:41.770
Like I don't want my target isn't to be right here.

00:32:41.770 --> 00:32:44.054
I want to be, you know, have a great relationship.

00:32:44.054 --> 00:32:45.816
So it kind of started me on the path.

00:32:45.816 --> 00:32:51.613
I kind of credited her for for because I was like I wanted to be with her more than I wanted to be angry Does that matter?

00:32:51.613 --> 00:32:52.865
Or I wanted to be lazy.

00:32:53.019 --> 00:32:54.946
I wanted to be with her more than you want to be angry.

00:32:54.967 --> 00:32:58.310
Yes, yeah, so that, and that's when I do marriage.

00:32:58.310 --> 00:33:02.173
I'm like, well, this be right, you're gonna be old and lonely dude.

00:33:02.173 --> 00:33:05.074
I mean, I don't care about being right, I want to be with her, you know.

00:33:05.074 --> 00:33:08.454
So she kind of really started me on this path.

00:33:08.454 --> 00:33:12.196
And then, as you begin to, you know, these things started to unfold.

00:33:12.196 --> 00:33:19.865
And here I don't say like the, the wisdom trail, the, the yellow brick road trail, the revelation, knowledge or understanding.

00:33:19.865 --> 00:33:20.688
It's progressive.

00:33:20.688 --> 00:33:25.085
You can't a lot of people be like, just give me the one, two minute tip to get inner armor.

00:33:25.085 --> 00:33:30.740
I'm like you're asking for like a Zempic shot to be like mentally, you know, armored up.

00:33:30.740 --> 00:33:32.244
It's there's nothing like that man.

00:33:32.265 --> 00:33:33.407
There's just no you know, so.

00:33:34.028 --> 00:33:35.512
So I I got that.

00:33:35.512 --> 00:33:37.425
You know, I'm like I can't be angry all the time I want to.

00:33:37.425 --> 00:33:39.089
So I started working on that cylinder, right.

00:33:39.089 --> 00:33:40.790
So harmonious relationships.

00:33:40.790 --> 00:33:43.573
And then, you know, your thoughts are kind of going crazy.

00:33:43.573 --> 00:33:46.315
I'm like, you know, there's times where I still have this emotional outbreaks.

00:33:46.315 --> 00:33:47.055
I don't like that.

00:33:47.055 --> 00:33:48.675
They're, you know, making emotional decisions.

00:33:48.675 --> 00:33:50.617
I don't have a process how I think my thoughts.

00:33:50.657 --> 00:33:57.582
So I thought, listen, I have a process for marksmanship, right, there's a process to swing in a golf club, there's a process to drive in the car.

00:33:57.582 --> 00:33:59.925
I should have a process for thinking my thoughts.

00:33:59.925 --> 00:34:03.250
So I came up with this you know, ordered process.

00:34:03.250 --> 00:34:06.535
I have a four-step process to think every thought, and that's in the back of the book.

00:34:06.535 --> 00:34:11.092
I gave it as an appendix, you know, because it's kind of a deeper, deeper teaching.

00:34:11.092 --> 00:34:12.425
It's not really tacked but it's good.

00:34:12.425 --> 00:34:14.487
So it's a critical thinking, thought process.

00:34:14.487 --> 00:34:16.005
I think every thought through this process.

00:34:16.005 --> 00:34:20.530
And so I could get my mental you know cylinder going.

00:34:20.550 --> 00:34:27.876
And once I got that, see, I'm doing these one at a time and I'll tell you my spiritual cylinder got done when I was six years old, right, and then 12, six, I got born again 12,.

00:34:27.876 --> 00:34:30.757
I decided the word of God's my highest authority, so that that one's taken care of.

00:34:30.757 --> 00:34:33.541
I know who I am in Christ and spiritual good right.00:34:33.541 --> 00:34:35.503


So once you get that done, then I worked on physical.00:34:35.503 --> 00:34:43.793


When I got physical done I yeah, I went to social because I was trying to do social without having the underlying.00:34:43.793 --> 00:34:46.315


I'm trying to do tactically have harmonious relationships.00:34:46.315 --> 00:34:49.523


Fighting my inner, you know, dialogue Does that make sense?00:34:50.125 --> 00:34:52.769


So, I'm going to get my my mental done.00:34:52.769 --> 00:34:56.289


After my mental, I thought, you know, I'm, I'm, I'm getting older.00:34:56.289 --> 00:35:12.764


These are taking a couple of years every time, you know, and I wrote down how, each one, at what age I was one time and there's literally like almost like a four or five year span where you become, where you have mastery of the cylinder and you got to work on that cylinder, you get, you know, you're trying to work on all of them at the same time.00:35:12.764 --> 00:35:17.061


You're, you're, you're just not, you're just splitting your focus Right.00:35:17.061 --> 00:35:18.704


So I want to build on each other.00:35:19.646 --> 00:35:23.210


A lot of people just want to go straight to financial If I get my financial cylinder right.00:35:23.210 --> 00:35:26.876


But I'm telling you that's a disaster because if you don't fix the other ones, the financial ain't going to help you.00:35:26.876 --> 00:35:28.523


It just makes you more of what you already are.00:35:28.523 --> 00:35:32.032


So we got that and then I got my mental done.00:35:32.032 --> 00:35:34.105


I got the emotional done, which was very difficult.00:35:34.105 --> 00:35:36.431


The emotional one is very hard to master.00:35:36.431 --> 00:35:39.342


It just takes a lot of work.00:35:39.664 --> 00:35:47.695


I mean, you literally have to speak to yourself out loud and get your body on board with this right, because your mind and your emotions will never agree.00:35:47.695 --> 00:35:49.543


They just don't.00:35:49.543 --> 00:35:52.480


They're like the State Department and the Department of Defense, right.00:35:52.480 --> 00:35:54.106


They have different missions, right?00:35:54.106 --> 00:35:55.204


So they're not going to agree.00:35:55.204 --> 00:35:58.670


So you've got to get your body as a swing boat to get on board or not, right?00:35:59.282 --> 00:36:01.400


So that's why I say you have to dominate your flesh.00:36:01.400 --> 00:36:04.686


Well, we already know that the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.00:36:04.686 --> 00:36:08.434


That means it doesn't mean that flesh is the easiest part to dominate.00:36:08.434 --> 00:36:10.003


This is what cracks me up in Christianity.00:36:10.003 --> 00:36:13.431


Right, with the flesh, your body is the easiest one to dominate.00:36:13.431 --> 00:36:21.608


And we got all these, you know, frat preachers and people were out of shape and they're like, the last time you dominated your body was when you learned how to get potty trained man, you know what I mean.00:36:21.608 --> 00:36:21.748


Like.00:36:21.748 --> 00:36:26.364


So you gotta, like it dominates your body so that you could renew your mind.00:36:26.445 --> 00:36:28.693


Right, your body's your problem, you know?00:36:28.693 --> 00:36:29.297


Oh, I'll just.00:36:29.297 --> 00:36:30.722


Could you pray that I lose weight?00:36:30.722 --> 00:36:34.009


No, no, stop eating twinkies, man, I love you.00:36:34.009 --> 00:36:35.932


Stop eating twinkies, right, you know.00:36:35.932 --> 00:36:41.784


So you just kind of get work through that process and that's kind of the journey I took and I my the final cylinder.00:36:41.784 --> 00:36:45.552


I left the final cylinder to be last was the financial, because I mean the final cylinder.00:36:45.552 --> 00:36:48.976


I left the final cylinder to be last was the financial, because if you're not, I mean the financial is really.00:36:48.976 --> 00:36:50.177


I'll say it like this.00:36:50.177 --> 00:36:55.867


I said it like this in the book If every dollar has a motion and a weight to it, there's no stability in your life.00:36:55.887 --> 00:36:56.548


Yeah.00:36:57.331 --> 00:36:57.510


Right.00:36:57.510 --> 00:36:59.235


So and what is the money about?00:36:59.235 --> 00:37:00.619


The money is about capacity.00:37:00.619 --> 00:37:08.371


If you don't have my, the money I have is about my capacity to live my purpose and my mission and my identity on all levels.00:37:08.994 --> 00:37:09.175


Right.00:37:09.315 --> 00:37:09.496


Right.00:37:09.496 --> 00:37:15.938


So it took me a while, and when I'm talking about the financial cylinder, I'm not talking about making more money or saving more money.00:37:15.938 --> 00:37:21.494


I literally and people think you're nuts when I do, when I tell them this but I invested in my financial spiel.00:37:21.494 --> 00:37:27.943


I spent $50,000 on coaching from some of the best financial dudes that tell me how does the financing system work?00:37:27.943 --> 00:37:30.155


Not investing, I don't care about it.00:37:30.155 --> 00:37:31.976


What are the rules of banking?00:37:31.976 --> 00:37:34.914


How does that work?00:37:34.914 --> 00:37:39.157


On the interest and the charges, they taught me how to move the money.00:37:40.211 --> 00:37:43.507


I raised my kids on $45,000 a year.00:37:43.507 --> 00:37:45.052


You know what I mean when I'm starting.00:37:45.052 --> 00:37:48.338


I mean I have three kids and they're in high school and they're like how do we do this?00:37:48.338 --> 00:37:49.800


I'm like well, a lot of it is.00:37:49.800 --> 00:37:52.416


I'm using the system to help us instead of hurt us.00:37:52.416 --> 00:37:58.632


But again, who wants to?00:37:58.632 --> 00:37:59.271


Are you studying that?00:37:59.271 --> 00:38:00.413


Are you just complaining that?00:38:00.413 --> 00:38:02.534


The evil football guys?00:38:02.534 --> 00:38:04.153


You want to play football.00:38:04.153 --> 00:38:05.094


Learn the rules, you know.00:38:05.094 --> 00:38:07.576


You know they're not evil, that's just the game, right.00:38:07.576 --> 00:38:10.317


So that's kind of the process that I went through.00:38:10.317 --> 00:38:10.777


Does that?00:38:10.777 --> 00:38:11.936


Does that answer your?00:38:11.956 --> 00:38:13.637


question.00:38:13.637 --> 00:38:17.358


I love that again going back into the book as well, even on the thinking side.00:38:17.358 --> 00:38:31.704


But the you know, the message that I'm hearing is that, of those eight cylinders that you're talking about, you use the term balance, but if those eight cylinders are not firing in unison in some way, shape or form, you're going to have problems, much like you're going to have with that tire.00:38:31.704 --> 00:38:34.766


You're going to have problems and you're not going to have the horsepower that you need.00:38:34.766 --> 00:38:48.853


I love the fact that even the eighth cylinder, if you will, of finance can be the fuel to the other seven, the capacity that you have to make those things happen.00:38:48.853 --> 00:38:57.440


But, lastly, what I heard is that each one of those requires a certain level of discipline, that you need to make a choice of what you want inside that space and then carry out that plan to make it happen, each one of those.00:38:57.440 --> 00:39:03.559


That it doesn't happen through serendipity, it doesn't happen accidentally, it doesn't happen without purpose.00:39:03.559 --> 00:39:06.563


In fact, it only happens on purpose.00:39:07.003 --> 00:39:14.059


Often, things that I talk about and understanding again, going all the way back to the start, understanding from that affirmative who I am and who do.00:39:14.059 --> 00:39:19.615


I aspire to be all part of that and going through those things, so I'd love that to bring it all together.00:39:19.615 --> 00:39:22.490


So you've you've written four books Now.00:39:22.490 --> 00:39:24.876


This one just came out a couple of months ago.00:39:25.577 --> 00:39:27.463


Actually, john, I have seven, there's seven.00:39:27.463 --> 00:39:30.538


Oh, I see four on, yeah, so now you have seven, yeah, yeah.00:39:30.557 --> 00:39:33.572


So I have to ask you what the next one's going to be, cause you probably got another one in there.00:39:33.572 --> 00:39:33.893


I got.00:39:33.932 --> 00:39:37.456


I got like 10 in the tank, so I got the so three of the one that's fiction.00:39:37.476 --> 00:39:40.559


The first one I wrote is kind of a fictionalized version of my bio.00:39:40.559 --> 00:39:43.943


It talks about me being the fat kid and all that, and it talks about some of my missions.00:39:43.943 --> 00:39:50.994


And it's fictionalized but inspired by true events, right.00:39:50.994 --> 00:39:52.641


And then I have the three I call the Mental Toughness of the Resilience book.00:39:52.641 --> 00:39:57.114


I have the Ground Zero Leadership, which is the original flagship corporate coaching manual, seven Secrets of Resilience for Parents.00:39:57.114 --> 00:39:58.036


And then I have Inner Armor.00:39:58.518 --> 00:40:09.876


Then on the theology side I have one called Covenant for Rookies and that explains—that was my dissertation for my PhD.00:40:09.876 --> 00:40:11.965


It's about the nine-step covenant process that God started with Abraham and finished with Jesus.00:40:11.965 --> 00:40:14.434


So if you have any questions, why do we do bread and wine on communion?00:40:14.434 --> 00:40:17.541


Why did Jesus have to die on a cross?00:40:17.541 --> 00:40:19.092


Why was the virgin birth important?00:40:19.092 --> 00:40:22.501


Why did God ask Isaac to be sacrificed?00:40:22.501 --> 00:40:22.601


Why?00:40:22.601 --> 00:40:24.835


I always had one of those questions growing up.00:40:24.835 --> 00:40:25.436


No one could answer.00:40:25.436 --> 00:40:27.672


They just look at me like what it just takes.00:40:27.672 --> 00:40:29.657


Faith, young man, don't question.00:40:29.657 --> 00:40:33.253


I don't think that's how that works, but that's what that book is.00:40:33.273 --> 00:40:36.001


Then the next one I wrote was called Righteousness, god's Equity.00:40:36.001 --> 00:40:41.836


And so a lot of people they don't know this, but my dad was a Greek scholar, so he was teaching me Greek when I was 13.00:40:41.836 --> 00:40:46.885


And that the Bible, the Koine Greek, was actually a business language, kind of like English.00:40:46.885 --> 00:40:49.875


International English is a business language.00:40:49.875 --> 00:40:52.806


The only thing they could find that stuff written on now is invoices and contracts.00:40:52.806 --> 00:40:54.931


Right, so it's a bit so.00:40:54.931 --> 00:41:01.503


Righteousness is literally the word equity, but we've, and so we don't even know what righteousness is.00:41:01.503 --> 00:41:04.876


We think it's like a behavior thing, but it's equity.00:41:04.876 --> 00:41:05.516


So it talks about.00:41:05.516 --> 00:41:13.893


There's equity as in you have equity in an asset in your house, and there's also a whole area of law, a court of equity, and that's how God hands down his judgments.00:41:13.893 --> 00:41:18.231


And I take you through the scriptures, very simple, about how judgments get handed down.00:41:18.231 --> 00:41:26.336


So when you're under the Ten Commandments that's the law Satan is the prosecuting attorney in a court of law and you're always going to lose in a court of law against the prosecutor.00:41:26.336 --> 00:41:34.902


Jesus is your defense attorney in the court of equity and you always win because you just say well, what Jesus did, that's what Jesus did.00:41:34.902 --> 00:41:37.293


So that book explains that, and then the one I just had.00:41:37.313 --> 00:41:41.159


It also just kind of came out the same time as Inner Armor, it was called Back to Basics Good and Evil.00:41:41.159 --> 00:41:47.159


And I went all the way back to the Garden of Eden, the first time that good and evil show up in the Bible.00:41:47.159 --> 00:41:52.577


There's the Hebrew words have 15 components of each, and we explain what evil actually is and what good is.00:41:52.577 --> 00:41:53.795


And it blow your mind.00:41:53.795 --> 00:41:58.811


It's revolutionary how we call evil good and good evil, I mean.00:41:58.811 --> 00:42:00.295


And yeah, like here's the first fifth.00:42:00.295 --> 00:42:01.398


I'll just give you some of the evil list.00:42:01.398 --> 00:42:02.742


The first one is like adversity.00:42:02.742 --> 00:42:04.588


That's literally the first thing.00:42:04.588 --> 00:42:08.257


Think about this, before Adam and Eve ate the fruit salad.00:42:08.257 --> 00:42:11.677


They only knew good, they only knew beauty, they only knew bounty, they only knew better.00:42:11.677 --> 00:42:13.929


As soon as they ate, that all they had was adversity.00:42:14.090 --> 00:42:15.452


They had affliction or sickness.00:42:15.452 --> 00:42:20.525


They had worry, anxiety, and worry is, and fear is literally on the evil list.00:42:20.525 --> 00:42:23.451


So you know you're like, well, I'm just worried about you.00:42:23.451 --> 00:42:24.233


You got to be careful.00:42:24.233 --> 00:42:26.260


You know you were literally we're on the evil list.00:42:26.260 --> 00:42:32.083


And then you know we find in Psalms that it says that the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.00:42:32.083 --> 00:42:43.722


So you could even be born again, gone to heaven, but doing evil by calamity and affliction and sorrow and despondency and anxiety, and that's why you can't win in life, because that's what you're doing.00:42:43.722 --> 00:42:47.130


God can't help you because you're going around behind his back, right?00:42:47.130 --> 00:42:48.153


So that's what that book is.00:42:48.153 --> 00:42:49.478


It kind of helps people.00:42:49.478 --> 00:42:50.481


So it's kind of a two-prong.00:42:50.481 --> 00:42:55.876


There's still that mental toughness, inner armor with all of my writings, but that's what we got out there right now, man.00:42:56.217 --> 00:42:56.757


No on that.00:42:56.757 --> 00:42:58.760


On that, evan, andrew, love that.00:42:58.760 --> 00:43:00.222


Thank you for sharing that as well.00:43:00.222 --> 00:43:12.340


Maybe I went to the wrong page in terms of seeing some of those things, but either way you look at it, folks, this guy is full of energy, full of wisdom and the ability to write and giving you the structures and frameworks in those eight areas of life.00:43:12.340 --> 00:43:17.702


Andrew, where is the best place for folks to connect with you and or learn more about you?00:43:17.702 --> 00:43:19.096


You write, but you also speak.00:43:19.096 --> 00:43:20.596


You're an executive coach.00:43:26.170 --> 00:43:26.751


You got learn more about you.00:43:26.751 --> 00:43:27.432


You write, but you also speak.00:43:27.432 --> 00:43:27.974


You're an executive coach.00:43:27.974 --> 00:43:29.237


You've got a lot of things going on.00:43:29.237 --> 00:43:30.079


I do got a lot of things going on.00:43:30.079 --> 00:43:32.083


So I have one page special just for the podcast listeners.00:43:32.083 --> 00:43:34.369


My website is getwarriortoughcom slash podcast and you'll see all that.00:43:34.369 --> 00:43:35.992


It'll be way for you guys to plug in.00:43:35.992 --> 00:43:36.914


You guys that are listeners.00:43:36.914 --> 00:43:43.492


So it's getwarriortough like a warrior, right Inner armor warrior.00:43:43.512 --> 00:43:44.514


Getwarriortoughcom slash podcast Excellent.00:43:44.514 --> 00:43:45.476


Thank you very much, Andrew.00:43:45.476 --> 00:43:47.822


I got to finish you off with the same question I always finish folks.00:43:47.822 --> 00:43:57.465


I give you the last word and let you know first of all, that I appreciate you adding value to the listeners of the Uncommon Leader Podcast and sharing with us for just a few minutes.00:43:57.465 --> 00:43:59.432


But I'm going to give you this billboard.00:43:59.432 --> 00:44:00.735


You can put it anywhere you want to.00:44:00.735 --> 00:44:05.751


What's the message you're going to put on that billboard and why do you put that message there, Ride?00:44:05.791 --> 00:44:08.036


hard, shoot straight and never lie.00:44:08.036 --> 00:44:09.820


So that was.00:44:09.820 --> 00:44:14.778


My commanding officer gave that speech in 1989 when I got on board with Weapons Company 36.00:44:14.778 --> 00:44:16.302


It was my company commander.00:44:16.302 --> 00:44:18.192


Desert Storm that's what he said.00:44:18.192 --> 00:44:19.373


A lot of these speeches are long.00:44:19.373 --> 00:44:20.813


His was ride hard, shoot straight, never lie.00:44:20.813 --> 00:44:24.177


It took me years to unpack that, but so riding hard is being excellent.00:44:24.177 --> 00:44:26.159


I'm going to give maximum effort in everything I do.00:44:26.159 --> 00:44:27.981


Shoot straight is about skill.00:44:27.981 --> 00:44:30.164


I'm going to be skillful when I'm trying to hit my target.00:44:30.164 --> 00:44:31.324


I'm going to acquire my target.00:44:31.324 --> 00:44:36.733


I'm going to be skillful in hitting my target and, of course, never lie.00:44:36.733 --> 00:44:38.335


Don't lie to yourself.00:44:38.836 --> 00:44:40.199


Andrew, thank you Once again.00:44:40.199 --> 00:44:41.641


I wish you the best going forward.00:44:41.641 --> 00:44:43.224


I would love to stay connected with you.00:44:43.224 --> 00:44:47.021


And I hope the folks that listen in will make sure to get out there and connect with you as well.00:44:47.429 --> 00:44:49.016


You're a mighty man of valor, Coach John.00:44:49.016 --> 00:44:50.155


Thanks for having me on, brother.00:44:53.731 --> 00:44:56.480


And that wraps up another episode of the Uncommon Leader Podcast.00:44:56.480 --> 00:44:57.655


Thanks for tuning in today.00:44:57.655 --> 00:45:05.141


If you found value in this episode, I encourage you to share it with your friends, colleagues or anyone else who could benefit from the insights and inspiration we've shared.00:45:05.141 --> 00:45:11.775


Also, if you have a moment, I'd greatly appreciate it if you could leave a rating and review on your favorite podcast platform.00:45:11.775 --> 00:45:19.626


Your feedback not only helps us to improve, but it also helps others discover the podcast and join our growing community of uncommon leaders.00:45:19.626 --> 00:45:22.777


Until next time, go and grow champions.